The self is both what it is and what it isn't. Some people are only able to see themselves for what they are and consider that that can also be what they aren't. Some people see themselves as what they aren't and are unable to look at what they are. Some will be unable to look at one and fixate on this lacking to the point of being incapable of identifying neither who they are nor who they aren't.
The self is intangible and invisible, it can't itself be seen but rather only inferred in the path it leaves, in the mark it leaves on the world and sometimes in the scars it leaves in bodies.
2.
To talk is to give up something. When we try to communicate, we compromise a lot of our nonsensical logic that can only exist in our head and give them a (hopefully) coherent and cohesive sentence. But language without others is non-existent. Nothing can exist on its own, least of all humans, who evolved through millennia to be as close as they can to another or feel distressed, even with the risk of loss and pain this provides, it's preferable to the alternative.
And again, this loss isn't wholly one sided, when someone answers back they do the same, they sacrifice their own language to speak yours. And in between this, in the hints of their language and the hint of yours, in the middle of it you will gain more than you can possibly lose. Even when it's fruitless. Even when it's pointless. Even when all was lost in translation.
3.
We have been blessed with language, and despite all conflict we have, there's an infinitesimal chance of being able to clear up things and justify any sort of action done. We live our day to day bumping into each other and hurting and we are able to survive this close proximity of bodies only thanks to the capacity for communication between one another. And despite our own idiosyncrasies, they might at times differ from the ones in front of us. Sometimes, we are unable to justify any atrocity in the face of an unwavering heart, and other times we are forgiven despite our best intentions.
Though in line with previous representations, it's interesting to have picked animals for this situation. An animal acts mainly on instinct, and any learned behavior has been indoctrinated into it. It can't argue or plead or talk, it has to be punished if there's any hope of changing unwanted behavior. Are you an animal?
3.5.
When i first read it, i instinctively picked the victim and perpetrator, my line of reasoning being that both victim and perpetrator examine their roles in conflict, even when it's to be dismissed at later points or to absolve guilt from themselves. But upon further introspection, or rather, seeing a different answer, I realized being asked the question it was including the bystander and could not leave it unpicked.
Must the fox be punished? I had considered it at the time of reading, and despite my gut feelings or any ideological standpoint I assume, I couldn't bring myself to punish it. If one is capable of growth without it, any punishment enforced is simply righteous anger, reserved for those who want to carry out harm they feel are worthy of giving out. Then again, if the fox is in search of a narrative satisfaction only given by punishment, then in a way atonement is perhaps a worse torture than a simple beating.
Does one thing change when it's another? Yes, but the answer remains the same. In sexual harm, subjectivity is enhanced and a lot of the correct answer is limited to what the parties believe of each other. I can try to persuade the snake, but ultimately it's in their hands, whether the answer is a fair or unfair one. Even in the case that one finds their answer to be wrong, their opinion holds more weight than any of ours combined.
To admit to a guilty conscience in art is as meaningful to punishment as putting up flyers on the street that say "I'M GUILTY! PUNISH ME!" The crowd's cheer or hate will be reserved not to you but to the imaginary figure that wrote it, the Author and not the person behind. Although this interpretation might be lacking in a clear cut answer to what I think you need from the audience, be it punishment, absolvement, or a manner of understanding, I hope there's comfort in knowing something new can come from misunderstanding, that lack of understanding is frustrating but can lead to places you wouldn't get to with just an understanding of yourself.
